This was a funny month especially at the beginning and coming after the holiday, KD was not required? Why I don’t know, may be post holiday blues but it did give more time to think what had happened before the holiday. On reflection, the “Miss X” matter had affected my confidence more than I thought and as person I did not need this type of situation. In consequence I decided that it would be better for me concentrate on what I wanted rather attempting to support / assist new girls in making friends & going out to the world at large. First thing that went by the board was any thoughts of organising another monthly evening meal - really why should I? Selfish this may seem but I needed to think about what I really wanted. Secondly, I contacted Teela not to forward my name to other girls in future as possible support & friendship. I really felt lousy telling Teela this as she had very good intentions from the start and idea of course was a sound one. However, she never expected the outcome on this and I felt it would be better all round use other girls for this particular purpose. I think Teela took this in the right wayt but I’m sure she felt partly responsible - however in my eyes she was not. Thirdly, this matter had affected my confidence but also trust in other people including my friends too. This was certainly a low point in my life as KD and I had no idea what the future lies other than “Sparkle” being on the horizon. May be something would turn up and change things?
As the month progressed, a sense of normality returned & post holiday blues disappeared. MR had always wanted a trouser suit and I was more than happy to get one for her. With MR’s previous encouragement, I wanted a trouser suit also and I had one in mind too complete with matching skirt. Well a shopping trip or two was had and we both ended up getting what we wanted and more!! I had also manage to get a second trouser suit which was a bonus! This shopping hive of activity gave me the impetus of wanting to be KD & go out again!!
MR was still being supportive to me which is a nice feeling to have and generally nothing was being too much for her. However, I knew she was a little apprehensive about Sparkle next month and something that I need to keep an eye on & continue to reassure her that it will be OK & a good time will be had. However I had no idea what we were going to do during the weekend as I had not thought about it - mmm time to think of things to do.
An unexpected opportunity sprang up for me to go out, as MR had made arrangements to attend a work friends celebration. I decided to meet another friend from Nottingham (& also Leeds too) & arrange to meet in the Village. Again I partly dress before hand and an interesting yet enjoyable evening was had. This included un expectantly having an in depth conversation with two young blokes who were curious & interested why we were T-Girls? Later on we were chatted up again but this was just friendly banter. All in all it was nice to be out again but also enjoyed myself too. However the night did not end as I expected and got home a lot later than MR expected. Mmmm all I would say I got a puncture on the way home and meant changing the wheel twice - fortunately I had some “bob” clothes with me as I though a lady changing a wheel in the middle of the night would attracted unwanted attention!!
Well that was May - mmmmm a strange sort of month but with some lessons learnt along the way too which will prove useful in future KD outings.
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