Well this was the month of Sparkle but that will come under its own heading! It has been a strange month for both MR & I but for different reasons. We had decided that it would be nice to go out again, just the two of us especially in the light of the March success. So Wed, 13th June was pencilled in, something to look forward too and I can be KD again! Alas faith played its part that it was not going to happen but for totally understandable reasons.
MR had a Breast Screening some weeks ago but she received a letter asking to go back for a recheck which happen to be Wed, 13th Jun. MR was understandably concerned and faring the worst. I had done my best to re-assure her that everything would be OK and it was just a precaution but they are only words after all! Regardless I was trying to remain positive and keep MR upbeat. In consequence, although neither of us actually said, we knew our night out was temporary cancelled. Anyway, all was well as it was just a lighter mark on the original X-Ray which caused the concern, as was not there on the 2nd X-Ray. The relief on MR’s face was a picture but understandable. I did feel for her and certainly puts things into perspective!
During this time, I also got a back toothache which eventually got taken out but caught an infection in the process. For over 10 days my jaw was in constant discomfort and I was certainly not at my best during this period. So for the first part of June, KD was just an illusion and only due to the Angels Forum & new Chatroom, they kept me sane and reminded me I am KD! .
There were a couple of friends of mine - yes Jenny and Jo who were for totally different reasons going through their personal hell. Jenny had been “stalked” for want of a better word by an unknown party and this causing her great concern. Also she had come to stage in her TV life were she needed to take some steps back to revalue her life especially after the last 9 months which has a whirlwind for her. Going from a closet TV to almost being publicably known. Rightly so she needed some time on her own - hopefully she makes the right decisions for the future. On the other hand Jo was going through personal turmoil regarding her relationship with the wife who did not want to know! I felt for her and at least had a small idea what she was going through but her situation was far worst. What I found remarkable even in the circumstances, Jo clearly loved her wife and was attempting to do almost anything to reach some sort of compromise, so Jo could be acknowledge she actually exists but the bottom line the wife don’t want to know! Oh I hope a little bit of light remains for this relationship to survive and Jo is certainly clinging on to this!! I feel for you hun.
With the above in mind, it makes me feel lucky but never the less I still say, what about me, KD how do I feel? Well MR is still supportive and that is a nice feeling to have. However, must not take things for granted and still watch my weary step in the future. I have found my self wishing to go out more but alas not always possible - some reasons I do understand especially when it comes to family / work matters - they must take priority. But as for myself, well I like being KD, enjoy wearing the clothes and everything associated with my femme life - its nice and I feel comfortable with it but need to do more though! I have actually dressed at home on couple of occasions this month which is something I don’t normally do - is this one of frustration on my part? Mmmm, some more thought is required and may be the answers will come in the future? Regardless, I’m still happy with dual life - why would I change it - the best of everything including the greatest prize of them all - MR! I am definitely don’t want to go down the TS route that is for sure - not something I could face or want but just would like to be KD a little more!!
MR had a Breast Screening some weeks ago but she received a letter asking to go back for a recheck which happen to be Wed, 13th Jun. MR was understandably concerned and faring the worst. I had done my best to re-assure her that everything would be OK and it was just a precaution but they are only words after all! Regardless I was trying to remain positive and keep MR upbeat. In consequence, although neither of us actually said, we knew our night out was temporary cancelled. Anyway, all was well as it was just a lighter mark on the original X-Ray which caused the concern, as was not there on the 2nd X-Ray. The relief on MR’s face was a picture but understandable. I did feel for her and certainly puts things into perspective!
During this time, I also got a back toothache which eventually got taken out but caught an infection in the process. For over 10 days my jaw was in constant discomfort and I was certainly not at my best during this period. So for the first part of June, KD was just an illusion and only due to the Angels Forum & new Chatroom, they kept me sane and reminded me I am KD! .
There were a couple of friends of mine - yes Jenny and Jo who were for totally different reasons going through their personal hell. Jenny had been “stalked” for want of a better word by an unknown party and this causing her great concern. Also she had come to stage in her TV life were she needed to take some steps back to revalue her life especially after the last 9 months which has a whirlwind for her. Going from a closet TV to almost being publicably known. Rightly so she needed some time on her own - hopefully she makes the right decisions for the future. On the other hand Jo was going through personal turmoil regarding her relationship with the wife who did not want to know! I felt for her and at least had a small idea what she was going through but her situation was far worst. What I found remarkable even in the circumstances, Jo clearly loved her wife and was attempting to do almost anything to reach some sort of compromise, so Jo could be acknowledge she actually exists but the bottom line the wife don’t want to know! Oh I hope a little bit of light remains for this relationship to survive and Jo is certainly clinging on to this!! I feel for you hun.
With the above in mind, it makes me feel lucky but never the less I still say, what about me, KD how do I feel? Well MR is still supportive and that is a nice feeling to have. However, must not take things for granted and still watch my weary step in the future. I have found my self wishing to go out more but alas not always possible - some reasons I do understand especially when it comes to family / work matters - they must take priority. But as for myself, well I like being KD, enjoy wearing the clothes and everything associated with my femme life - its nice and I feel comfortable with it but need to do more though! I have actually dressed at home on couple of occasions this month which is something I don’t normally do - is this one of frustration on my part? Mmmm, some more thought is required and may be the answers will come in the future? Regardless, I’m still happy with dual life - why would I change it - the best of everything including the greatest prize of them all - MR! I am definitely don’t want to go down the TS route that is for sure - not something I could face or want but just would like to be KD a little more!!
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